Monday, October 18, 2004

Class Nut Shot 101

Alright, you know how a few days back I disclosed the contents of my night at Jerry's, telling you all what happend, where I got hurt, and how excited I was? Well, this story will have a similar plot, but maybe not the same ending...

It started out like every other concert I had been to at Jerry's, standing in the dark, dank basement, waiting for the main bands to play. As I waited, I usually watched the local bands that play, some which are very talented and some that suck so hard, the shell could be ripped off an egg. Well, I just sat there, watching, getting really fucking bored because I wanted to see Scars of Tomorrow and I was watching fucking Hatchet and Annie. Nothing against them, but I paid for the main attraction, not the sideshow.

After about two hours, TWO FUCKING HOURS...., Nodes of Ranvier, one of the main bands, finally comes on the stage. I didn't know how they sounded, so I just sorta watched. I assumed they would be all emo and queer, but I was wrong. Emo and queer would have been funnier though. Well, after that Scars of Tomorrow came on and I was like "Fuck yea!!!" I got to sing into the mic and all that jazz, you know, standard shit. Well, to my surprise, after SoT, Caliban got on and began tearing that shit up. Forgetting to mention this beforehand, Diljner was with me the entire time and we fuckin' freaked when we saw Caliban.

Well, I thought it was going to be a pretty standard night after they got on, but, nope, I was wrong...again. At this time, I was standing away from the pit, seeing that I never was too particular to it with a huge ass fuckin' albino guy who was around 33 years old, throwing his weight around like he's Jarred from Subway BEFORE he lost all the weight. This guy would come out, get tapped by some other kid in the pit, and then freak out, push him as hard as he could and proceed to punch at him and then everyone else. I made sure I had at least on row of people in front of me. Stupid albino fag. Well, anyway, the band was playing it up, making the whole thing worth it, [just as SoT and NoR]. With only a few songs left, I thought to myself, "Wow, I got off scott-free, without an accident." Wrongo. Right after I think this, I'm standing there, watching the band with my body facing toward the pit, when...

...holy fucking shit...


*Crack*


[Look of pain]


I sorta just stand there, interpreting what just happend to me. I look down in utter disbelief as a very short, emo-ish looking girl, not an inch over 5'2", goes into the pit, does her little windmill thing, then does a spin kick...INTO MY RIGHT NUT! I begin wincing in pain as I feel it begin to do that tingle/shooting pain feeling from my hip to my right knee. It wasn't like normal pain when you get hit in the nuts, where you feel sick, wanting to throw up, as the pain jumps from your balls to your stomach to your throat. ...No, think growing pains. The following conversation occured:

Me "Dude, Diljner, I just got kicked in my right nut..."
Diljner [Begins laughing...hard]
Me [Looks around, sees hot girl to my right laughing, gay looking guy to my left laughing]
Diljner "You alright dude?"
Me [Look of pain] "I guess... The pain keeps going down my leg."

After that, I was hurting for a good hour and a half. I kept looking back at Diljner to show him the true face of pain. He now understands it...

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haha albino fag... Anyways ouch that sucks!! Although being a girl I don't know how it feels. Hey at least you had a kick ass time! Heh.

~Amy~

12:18 AM  
Blogger Last_Serenade said...

emo and queer like Cory? hah

anyways, dan got kicked in righty...i wouldn't know the feeling but u know, u always give such vivid details...i think i get the picture ~J

7:12 AM  

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