Wow, We Are Fucktards...
Let us go back, way back to the year 2003. This is the year I met Pimp Meister. Now, I'm going to continue to use short, stalky sentences because I am, in fact, a lazy whore. Anyway, I met Pimp on a Carnival Cruise during the early summer and we became quick buddies. We hung out a bit after the cruise, then began doing it more and more. We then did everything together, I don't remember shit on what, but I do know we did a lot. Anyway, let's get back to what I was talking about.
Alright, I believe this was the last day I saw him of that year because my mom went psycho on his mother about being too lax on rules or some shit and basically banned me from seeing him. Oh well, jokes on her, [not really], I just recently started hanging out with him again. We are going to pwn those little kids on Halloween. *Burn!* Well, seeing as it was the last day, I might as well tell you what day it was...The Third of July. He was spending the night because I had to work on the fourth, [fuckin' Edwards *shakes fist*], and we decided to use the night as if it was truly the day we celebrate our liberation from Britain. Anywho, thinking we were cool kids and making bombs, we used some duct tape and taped a whole bunch of Piccolo Petes together [11] and lit them all simaltaneously and stood back to watch the show. Let's just say that shit was so loud that it was still making our ears ring when we covered them. We also taped up those spiny fireworks together, but they just caught fire...haha good thing too because we were running out of lighter fluid and the wind was picking up, screwing up our whole 'light and run' tactic.
So, everything is running smoothly, we use all the screamers up early on in the night so we didn't wake up my parents and activate their nazi mode, aka I GOTTA WAKE UP EARLY. After that, we used to little popper shits and hit each other like it was WWII and started lighting the other spinners that weren't attached via duct tape. So we just went apeshit for about two hours, doing random fireworks, till we arrived at the epitome of our fireworks pile, the firecrackers. This may not seem all that great, but they were the only illegals we had, so shove off...mashers.
We had a killer time with the bunch of them, lighting a string and watching the group explode, or tearing off individuals and letting them have their own personal parties. Well, this went on for a good while, and they weren't too loud, so we figured it was ok to continue. This is where we come to the bad idea of the night.
Around 11 o'clock, we finally get to our last firecracker. This wee little guy was just sitting there and we decided to blow his ass up, assuming afterwards we'd play on Pimp's PS2 that was promptly brought to my house. So, I grab the sucker and do what we did with the previous billion others and held it in my hand, precisely in between my thumb and pointer finger. I'm holding the sucker right in front of my face and Pimp lights it. Then comes the bad part. Now, you would think that a firecracker with a long wick would give you at least a 10 second period to throw it, well this one decided to be a rebel. As the flame hit the wick, it takes off, hitting the gunpowder not a half-second later. As it explodes inbetween my fingers, reactions occur. I blink, Pimp turns his head. Good move on my part, bad move on Pimp's...
When I blink, the force does not affect my eyes, but it does, in fact, affect my ears. I am now partially deaf. I hear a ringing like no other and can't tell what the fuck is happening. Pimp, on the otherhand, isn't partially deaf in both ears, just one. When he turned his head you see, he ended up putting his left ear directly in line of fire. Okay, imagine this, at the time I was 16, Pimp was 14, I believe, and we are both deaf in one way or another. How do you think we reacted?
Me "DUDE! WHAT JUST HAPPENED!?"
Pimp "WHAT!?"
Me "WHAT HAPPENED!"
Pimp "I DON'T KNOW, BUT I CAN'T HEAR!"
Me [I was a little concerned about what time it was] "OKAY, WHAT TIME IS IT!?"
Pimp "WHAT?!"
Me "WHAT TIME IS IT!?"
Pimp "ELEVEN!"
Me "HUH...!?"
Pimp "ELEVENNNN!"
This went on for several seconds and then we decided that we were probably being too loud for the neighborhood and went inside, feeling defeated by that fucking little firecracker. PS2 action occured shortly after and our hearing eventually came back during the night. We had some firework action the day of the fourth, but it wasn't as eventful as the night prior. Overall, all I can say is that Pimp and I are officially fucking stupid, but then again, all my friends are...
Alright, I believe this was the last day I saw him of that year because my mom went psycho on his mother about being too lax on rules or some shit and basically banned me from seeing him. Oh well, jokes on her, [not really], I just recently started hanging out with him again. We are going to pwn those little kids on Halloween. *Burn!* Well, seeing as it was the last day, I might as well tell you what day it was...The Third of July. He was spending the night because I had to work on the fourth, [fuckin' Edwards *shakes fist*], and we decided to use the night as if it was truly the day we celebrate our liberation from Britain. Anywho, thinking we were cool kids and making bombs, we used some duct tape and taped a whole bunch of Piccolo Petes together [11] and lit them all simaltaneously and stood back to watch the show. Let's just say that shit was so loud that it was still making our ears ring when we covered them. We also taped up those spiny fireworks together, but they just caught fire...haha good thing too because we were running out of lighter fluid and the wind was picking up, screwing up our whole 'light and run' tactic.
So, everything is running smoothly, we use all the screamers up early on in the night so we didn't wake up my parents and activate their nazi mode, aka I GOTTA WAKE UP EARLY. After that, we used to little popper shits and hit each other like it was WWII and started lighting the other spinners that weren't attached via duct tape. So we just went apeshit for about two hours, doing random fireworks, till we arrived at the epitome of our fireworks pile, the firecrackers. This may not seem all that great, but they were the only illegals we had, so shove off...mashers.
We had a killer time with the bunch of them, lighting a string and watching the group explode, or tearing off individuals and letting them have their own personal parties. Well, this went on for a good while, and they weren't too loud, so we figured it was ok to continue. This is where we come to the bad idea of the night.
Around 11 o'clock, we finally get to our last firecracker. This wee little guy was just sitting there and we decided to blow his ass up, assuming afterwards we'd play on Pimp's PS2 that was promptly brought to my house. So, I grab the sucker and do what we did with the previous billion others and held it in my hand, precisely in between my thumb and pointer finger. I'm holding the sucker right in front of my face and Pimp lights it. Then comes the bad part. Now, you would think that a firecracker with a long wick would give you at least a 10 second period to throw it, well this one decided to be a rebel. As the flame hit the wick, it takes off, hitting the gunpowder not a half-second later. As it explodes inbetween my fingers, reactions occur. I blink, Pimp turns his head. Good move on my part, bad move on Pimp's...
When I blink, the force does not affect my eyes, but it does, in fact, affect my ears. I am now partially deaf. I hear a ringing like no other and can't tell what the fuck is happening. Pimp, on the otherhand, isn't partially deaf in both ears, just one. When he turned his head you see, he ended up putting his left ear directly in line of fire. Okay, imagine this, at the time I was 16, Pimp was 14, I believe, and we are both deaf in one way or another. How do you think we reacted?
Me "DUDE! WHAT JUST HAPPENED!?"
Pimp "WHAT!?"
Me "WHAT HAPPENED!"
Pimp "I DON'T KNOW, BUT I CAN'T HEAR!"
Me [I was a little concerned about what time it was] "OKAY, WHAT TIME IS IT!?"
Pimp "WHAT?!"
Me "WHAT TIME IS IT!?"
Pimp "ELEVEN!"
Me "HUH...!?"
Pimp "ELEVENNNN!"
This went on for several seconds and then we decided that we were probably being too loud for the neighborhood and went inside, feeling defeated by that fucking little firecracker. PS2 action occured shortly after and our hearing eventually came back during the night. We had some firework action the day of the fourth, but it wasn't as eventful as the night prior. Overall, all I can say is that Pimp and I are officially fucking stupid, but then again, all my friends are...
posted by Arrhythmia at 11:04 PM
1 Comments:
I didn't go to school today either which explains why I didn't leave the comment "first thing in the morning". I still feel as if though I gonna die. Anywho...I'm not stupid! Ok, I may sometimes...alright, all the time....geez kid. Hahaha....you're smart...damn firecracker! Oh man, my little brothers smuggled fireworks from mexico...good old black market they have (in mexico). Yep Yep and I found some old toys I know they dont want or need for that matter so they're gonna go bye byez. Buahahaha...Unfortunately I torn apart all my old dolls and mom threw them away otherwise I'd blow those too. Hey what does your thingy majig name mean? Well I think I got off the subject....and I shall take my leave now. Take care kid.
Always,
Brisa
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